Mayfield: A Saga

Even though me first match was a disaster, I hired that ol’ gypsy again and paid her another 5,000 simoleons. She assured me this time would be the love of me life (again). But that was another wasted 5 grand. This time I had a boring date with one Nikki Melon. This woman was so old that she made me granny look like a young’un. Now I know some young folks go for the older, more mature type…take Azura Persea and her new husband Tucker Trimble for instance. But those two got somethin’ that me and Nikki can never have….a baby. But the wool that finally covered the sheep’s eyes was how strict the ol’ coot was. She immediately came into me house, and started bossin’ me kids around. “Don’t run in the house Finley…no cookies before dinner Meara…turn that music down Dowe…” Oh man was she gettin on me nerves! Needless to say, that date didn’t last long.

So, after two failed matches, I decided to take matters into me own hands once again. The best way to sheer sheep is to do it yerself…you can never trust the help (or the gypsy). So, I must’ve talked to every woman I saw. First one that caught me eye was Steffi Nanale, a waitress at that cafe I told ya about. But she was too busy servin’ food to really talk to me.

Then there was Carla Barthelet, whom I met when me and Jomo were out bowlin’ one night. Carla was pretty nice. We romanced for a while, but then she dumped me one day after I beat her at a game of chess. I guess me ol’ brain was just too smart for her!

I was gettin’ desperate. I couldn’t find any woman to keep interest in me for more than a day. So I resorted to love potions! Yep, you heard right. I figured I could trick a woman into lovin’ me. So, I had my mail-woman over one day, and I chugged the bubbly potion down. I felt all warm inside, and I thought “This is it! Noone can resist me now!” But then I heard me mail-woman just a laughin’ at me like I was a newly shaved sheep, and I my warm feelin’ went away faster than you can say “Baaaaaa”.

As a last ditch effort, I decided to call up that ol’ gypsy once more. I paid her once again, and closed me eyes as me date fell from the sky. But this time, I was happy with the woman I saw swaying unsteadily before me. She was beautiful. Blond hair, blue eyes, and even trendy with her slanty hat and wide black rimmed glasses. She had my heart before she even stopped seein’ stars! Her name: Mallory Fancey.